Every time we went to the hospital we would bring our little icon of the Virgin of Guadalupe. I had found her in one of the California mission towns that I had visited with Lueza. I can't explain it. I am not Catholic. I am half Jewish and half Episcopalian. But I love rosaries and prayer beads. I love icons. We would bring "Guadalupe" in the hospital bag. Mommy's computer and charger, Lu's DVD's, my pillow, pajamas, book, creams and lotions, diapers, phone and Guadalupe. We would hang her from the metal pole that gave IV fluids, antibiotics and liquid feedings. It was our way of controlling this anonymous hospital space. We needed ritual of some sort. She brought her beauty and gentleness into Lueza's room.